When she initial asked me if I’d want to consider playing with her along with her heterosexual cis-male companion, I happened to ben’t seeking a three-way. I wanted to understand more about sex with femme-presenting ladies.

We watched lovers whom looked for thirds the way in which many more carry out, as questionable and only into their increases – as dreaded unicorn hunters.

But the woman information had been nice, and that I thought, ‘You need to?’

I had no knowledge about threesomes with bi-curious lovers. I got just come out annually prior as a bisexual and polyamorous woman after covering for many years, and leaping from just one monogamous right link to the next.

Getting bisexual brought the most common tags of being ‘dirty’ for enjoying people intimately.

Becoming polyamorous and engaging in casual gender meant I happened to be also promiscuous, perhaps not psychologically loyal sufficient, and branded a cheater before we also came across for a coffee.

Being plus-size with a human anatomy image/eating condition merely increased the feelings of inadequacy and embarrassment for who i will be.

So when she messaged me personally, advising me she thought I became stunning, and asking us to satisfy the girl and her spouse for a glass or two to discover how we thought, I got the opportunity.

Two lips instead of one, four arms in place of two worshipped my own body, and that I them. And for the first time in a very long time, we believed desired, attractive, and wanted. And first and foremost, we decided i possibly could finally end up being myself.

U

nicorn searching
is quite
a term that describes
lovers, generally cisgender, bi-curious ones, on the lookout for a third to become listed on all of them for intimate play. This
3rd
, appropriately known as the
‘unicorn’
when it comes to seen rareness of the presence, is actually essentially a cisgender, thin, femme-presenting bisexual or bi-curious girl, one that is unmarried, delighted with no Strings Attached (NSA) arrangements, and additionally be intimately exclusive aided by the few.

I’m not a genuine unicorn when I’m maybe not solitary, intimately special, nor slim.

My personal major partner phone calls me a rainicorn alternatively. I find the term endearing as rainicorns (motivated by

Adventure Time

) are available all kinds of colours, forms, and characters. I thrive on becoming a third for partners, providing their intimate fantasies your with no extra strings of an emotional accessory. We take fantastic satisfaction in being the object they both desire.

Intimacy, for my situation, is generally but a wonderful minute, a short night of passion without more expectations.

Anti-unicorn looking has developed from a requirement to emphasize the harms that numerous bisexual cisgender and femme-presenting females encounter when they’re hunted by partners for prospective three-ways. It often promotes throuple and triad conditions in place of one off sexual activities so that the liberties of involved.

And I also get it. find bisexual women can be usually painted as promiscuous, sexual items, intimately fresh, hyper-sexual, and thought getting up for almost any and all of intercourse, including three-ways. Numerous currently maltreated by this exercise of searching, and this can not be marked down.

The truth is however, I am most of those ideas. Being a unicorn happens to be the one and only set in which these facets of my personal identity being regularly painted as myths about bisexual everyone is appreciated.

Since the feminist philosopher Ann Cahill implies, not to end up being sexually objectified, such as in the case of fat females, is seen as being denied a sex and authorization to relish satisfaction, one thing to which I have actually felt highly for the majority of my entire life.

Embracing this identification features allowed us to seek intimate fulfilment in a new pair of steps, also to engage my personal hyper-sexuality, versus refute it.

I am fed up with men and women speaking for me personally, let’s assume that Im usually in danger of exploitation from the absolute premise of my personal bisexuality and femme-presenting gender. That getting hunted means Im usually prey. That i need to constantly desire an intense, intimate, and on-going union with several versus some thing informal.

W

hile we are colored as ‘rare’, I think there might be even more women like me in concealing. After all, precisely why would we or anyone wanna appear forward publicly as a unicorn, when user discussion forums etc paint unicorn hunters as ‘disgusting’ and simply trying to ‘spice upwards their particular boring sex schedules’?

In which does that leave those who are whom enjoy being section of those characteristics since the hunted?

When shaming these lovers occurs, our company is in addition shaming the unicorns just who take part in these techniques. Our company is generating the narrative wherein bi-curious NSA three-ways tend to be regarded as usually inherently challenging experiences, and additionally strengthening the notion that ladies merely ever want romantic link, we cannot come to be contemplating only intercourse.

We have to open area and start to become conscious in the assortment of intimate encounters. We could possibly engage in a selection of sexual techniques and involvements, as well as some people bi-women, getting promiscuous, ready to accept NSA three-ways, and hyper-sexual, is not a terrible thing.

Neither is it an inherently bad representation of bisexuality much more broadly. All things considered, it is really not the representation that is the issue, it will be the method by which it’s weaponised.

Unfortunately, the anti-unicorn ‘community’ is doing a really okay task of pathologising me personally, and females anything like me, because we dare choose to embrace aspects of our selves being viewed as a ‘problem’ by other people. Because we dare to be ‘bad’ bisexuals.

I am a bisexual ‘rainicorn’.

And I you shouldn’t exactly like being hunted.

I fucking love it.

Rainicorn works in study, focusing on bodies, sexuality and gender, intimate techniques, and health insurance and health. She recognizes as a bisexual, cisgender, polyamorous plus-size Anglo-Celtic lady, and is also intercourse positive, kink/fetish good, and excess fat positive. Inside her spare-time, she likes decorating and creating music, therefore the delicious delights regarding the carnal underworld.

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